The State of Things

Three things have happened since my last blog entry. Well, two things and an epiphany. Which I guess is of equal or even larger value than a thing. It might even count for a thing and-a-half, or perhaps two small-to-medium sized things. Why we don't learn how to solve fundamental everyday dilemmas like these at school is a mystery to me: then again, many things are mysteries to me and maths are certainly not among my strongest talents (of which I have remarkably few). Where was I? Oh, yes: the things. And one epiphany.

Thing one: Replacements for my favorite rubber-based contraceptives arrived in my mailbox last Friday, along with a small, handwritten note from the supplier - no mention of my long-winded (but hopefully humorous) e-mail, just a few words along the lines of "We're sorry the postman nicked yer rubbers, here are some new ones." Which is perfectly acceptable to me. Be nice to the costumer support department, and chances are they just might return the favor.

Thing two: My annual December cold arrived a little early this year, for the last week it's been annoyingly present without incapacitating me. I even somewhat gracefully participated in this weekend's bowling/tapas/"Casino Royale"-combo with my girlfriend and friends M & G. The verdict: Daniel Craig makes for a pretty darn good Bond, tapas make for some pretty darn good grub and my bowling skills make for some pretty darn good entertainment (for all the wrong reasons).

Today - on my day off - I'm at home tending to the last remnants of my cold and feeling slightly sorry for myself among the heaps of used Kleenex and crap mid-day TV. Which brings me to my epiphany: Snot.

Why on earth are we spending precious time and money developing alternative sources of energy, when the power of snot is just waiting to be harnessed? It's readily available - most humans seem to be producing an almost endless amount of it during the Winter season - and completely biodegradable! Surely, an average Norwegian 4-year old could easily power a small apartment building alone, and all those kinder gardens out there are potential power-plants of unfathomable power! Ok, so there are certain bio-hazard issues to solve, and of course trying to figure out how to actually extract energy from runny, bacteria-infected goop, but think of the possibilities.

Sure, it's gross, but it still beats thermonuclear meltdowns and fossil-based energy: if a snot-tanker crashes somewhere, the only thing we'll have to worry about is a large amount of seagulls with the sniffles.

I am legend!

Right, so I haven't done a blog entry in ages, I have a nasty cold, work today has been a total killer and the weather is... well, it is.

Still, two things got me through the day:

1) I am a legend. Well, a Røde legend to be exact. Most of you don't know what that means, and that's quite okay. For me, it means I've been given some cool, free stuff - pretty cool stuff, to be honest. Which will in no way affect my objectivity in my work, mind you: I'll still let you know what's crap and what's not whenever you buy something from me. Promise!


2) It's Friday. Which is my favorite day of the week, for at least one reason that I won't mention here. It's a good reason, though. Maybe even the best. Quite possibly the best. Yeah, let's use that one. Now, get the heck outta here.